answers... well, sorta

I have a little explanation but not really an answer for you all as to whats going on around these parts.  I've had a lot of questions about what in the heck yesterdays post is referring to and also the little secret project I've been working on since September came back up yesterday too.

Well here's the thing.  I'm busting at the seems to divulge every single detail about what's up but after  discussing (just moments ago) whether or not I should tell all with my husband, we came up with these conclusions.

When I tell all about something I am working on or towards...

1  ... I end up feeling in bondage about "said goal/project" and then end up resenting the "said goal/project" because it no longer becomes fun.

2 ... the pressure of the world sets in which can sometimes be a good thing but usually makes me feel overwhelmed and makes me want to quit. I hate quitting.

And also...

 I'm a "TA-DA" sort of girl.  I like to show my goal/project complete.

And so that makes me realize that I don't want to share every detail because then some of the sparkle's taken away for me.  And I fear failure if I lose the sparkle. Does that make sense?

  But what I can tell you is that yesterdays post totally refers to a fitness goal that I have set for myself and I will report soon on those results.  

As for the bigger news, well the best you can do it just encourage me and hopefully over the next few months I can divulge the nitty gritty goodness when I'm at a point where I'm confident to dish.

And no promises but I'll try not to be so tempting by dangling little secrets before in the future.

today

- marks a day of change -

more on this to come...

for the love of dance

I have been having a lot of severe back pain for the last few weeks. After lots of doctor appointments, prescriptions, and today x-rays, they have discovered the problem.

Having been a dancer for so many years - the intense strain has finally taken it's toll on my body.

The gorgeous tu-tu's and satin toe shoes have caught up with me.

Now we wait for the results of the x-rays and begin physical therapy.

BLAH BLAH BLAH

Sweet Friends

Here's a couple pics of our night out last Saturday.  

Myself, Isaac, Rachel  (Georgianna in belly) and Josh.

Can you tell Josh is a bit excited about his baby girl?

We have spent every single birthday with Josh since we became friends... I think that's like 9 or 10 birthdays now.  WOW!  He's dubbed us The Fearsome Foursome.  We're so blessed to have such awesome friends in our lives.  Here's to a whole bunch more birthdays!

I love you guys and can't wait to hold and smooch that sweet baby girl.

gotsta get me some of these

I've got shoes on the brain.

I know that I never wear tennies except when I work out but if I had these I think I'd where them grocery shopping and to the park and who knows where else just so I could be doing a little extra toning while I walk.  

Reebok's Easytone sneakers will work your hamstrings and calves up to 11% harder and tone your butt 28% more than regular sneakers just by walking.  The shoes have bosu ball inspired technology that engages the muscles in your legs and glutes. 

I don't know about you but sexy legs are a must in my book and if I can get a sneaker that pushes me a little more without taking anymore time outta my day... well then sign me up! 

Ooooh and I've read a lot of good reviews on them too!

Hmmmm...

Maybe a birthday fairy will bring me a pair.

i've got a good one

Let me tell you why he's the MacDaddy.

I've been sick since Sunday.  You know that lovely little 70's party we went to? Well my husband remembers it as the night I wore the cutest, sexiest dress while puking all over the side of my car and all over the parking lot of our nicest hotel in town.  And yep he held my hair while I puked in that cute little dress. Sniff, sniff. I'm still mortified over the whole thing.  And no it wasn't alcohol, I was not feeling well when I woke up that morning and wasn't able to eat or drink all day.  UGH!  I even had to leave my besties baby shower a bit early I was so hot and dizzy.  

(this is us before the party and me putting on my best poker face)

Honestly, I still feel like crap but it's better than Sunday.  It's my hubb's only full day off this week and I'm just feeling exhausted not to mention I think I've cried 5x today.  I think it's a combo of recovering from the flu and just plain exhausted.  He cooked dinner last night and is currently grocery shopping.  He's even buying all my "girl products" and is totally cool with it.  He's the man.  

(dang, he looks good)

He also rubbed my back with icy hot last night which in my opinion smells like Heaven but in his opinion smells like Hell.  Then instead of watching his series in the cozy living room on our ginormous HD  flat screen tv, he streamed it on my computer so he could sit in bed with me.  

Let me put this simply a 13" screen vs a 52" screen.  In man terms "BIG DEAL".

(this pic is plain sexy to me... it's during his workout and well it's just hot so consider it a freebie - Lol!)

And right now he's out buying me a Wii fit cuz laying in bed being sick makes me feel lazy and fat and well we just can't have that.  

I'm thankful for you baby and I appreciate that you take care of me.

SMOOCH!

this weekend

this weekend is slammed like the door of an angry teenager.

Okay not really but it is packed like the suitcase of a lady going on vacation for a week... and we all know that is VERY full.

Today I dropped a cleaning bomb over my entire house and yes folks, it's sparkling gorgeous.

I also made a big bowl of my super delicious chicken salad that my Gram taught me to make as a child - except I add grapes. Mmmmm!

In a few minutes I'll be jumping in a hot bath to relax for a few because I know it will be my only moment of rest this weekend.

Then it's off to rehersal for the 1950's dinner theater I'm in.  Just call me Bunny Sue.

After practice we're headed to celebrate one of our most beloved friends birthday.

Happy Birthday Joshua!

Then home to snuggle in bed for a few hours sleep before the big day tomorrow starts.

Which is first going to be throwing my besties baby shower to welcome Georgianna Grace. Don't you just love that name?  I sure do!

And followed by our annual police party which is a 1970's disco theme.  

Can you feel tha funk?

(img credit via weheartit and google images)

It's gonna be a great weekend!

OH NO HE DIDN'T!!!

Why? Why oh why can I not go somewhere, anywhere for that matter without something ridiculous happening.  It's like a law of nature that if something crazy or embarrassing is going to happen it's going to be when I'm around.

Well today I had to go to the doctor and while there he asked me to get some lab work done.  I proceeded down to the lab and sat down in one of two patient chairs to give them my insurance information.  While I sat there a male lab tech came and sat with the another employee at the desk right next to me.

The phone rang and it was the guys wife who was hysterical that someone just broke down their fence and stole their dogs.  

While sitting there I listened to the whole story and overheard that his wife was calling the police etc.  They asked me to have a seat in the waiting room and I did.  My chair happened to be just behind the male lab tech and other employee and I was only about 6 feet away at that point.  

The phone rang again and it was his wife who told him that their neighbors found the dogs and everything was okay.  

The guy was very relieved and told his wife what a good job she had done and that he was glad the dogs were safe.  

BUT HERE'S THE KICKER...

While he was talking to her, he lifted the back of his shirt.  

AND STUCK HIS HAND DOWN HIS PANTS AND GAVE HIS BUTT CHEEK A RUB.

I could see the band of his boxers and his scrubs and his hand was down 

BOTH PAIRS!.

All I could think was  - Oh my gosh! Are you kidding me this cannot be the guy who takes blood. I immediately grabbed my phone and began Facebooking this nastiness to my friends.  And at the same time he turned around and said, "Jillian will you come with me?"

OH CRAP! NO WAY!  

I felt a wave of panic come over me. Do I shrug it off and let him take my blood all the while trying not to throw up?  Do I tell him he's disgusting and run away?  

Oh my gosh this dude was just rubbin' his BUNS and now wants to put me in a so called sterile environment and pierce a needle exposing my body to his booty hands?

"Jillian, will you come with me?" he said.

I sat pretty much froze, starred straight ahead at the ground and said.

"nooooo. (long awkward silence)  I'm sorry but you'll have to get someone else to take my blood."

(fidget, fidget)

He walked away very puzzled and said, "Ooooooo-kay, she wants someone else to take her blood."

The other patient who was sitting toward the back corner of the waiting room looked at me with eyes begging to know what was going on.

I told her,

"HE HAD HIS HANDS DOWN HIS PANTS, TOUCHING HIS BUNS!  

You should have seen the look on her face - ha ha.

A new lady came and said, "Can I take you blood?" (LOL!)

I said of course and followed her into the blood draw area.  I explained the whole thing and she couldn't quit laughing and apologizing.  

I'm just glad she understood because I was mortified.

a fav of mine

This has been one of my favorite songs for a long time.  I found a new version of it that blows my skirt up. Justin Timberlake is probably my fav but Kate Voegele is right up there with him for her super cool rendition.  Listen to this song and you can know a little bit of the sound that echos from the walls in my home because Isaac and I play and sing this one all the time.

ENJOY!

The Incident

It's interesting to me how I write about everything on my blog from fashion finds and relationships to cooking and talks with God.  But when something super intense happens I seem to shy away, back off and keep the very intimate details personal.  I almost do a 180.  But really when something happens that tears at my heart, first I run to God and then to you, my friends, is where I want to run to let it all out.

Well as some of you know my husband is a police officer.  About a month and a half ago he was forced into the most difficult decision he has or will have to make in his profession.  He was involved in a shooting which resulted in the death of the man that tried to kill him and another officer. This man was hopped up on cocaine and very drunk when he charged screaming at my husband and another officer with a knife in his hand. The media went into a frenzy and our world felt like it got turned upside down.  

I don't really want to go into the details because it feels as though that's all we've talked about for weeks on end.  The fact is, both officers did the right thing.  But the right thing is never ever easy.

I don't feel like I need to vent the details but I do feel like I want to scream from the top of my lungs to please show respect to the men and women in uniform.  They truly are in the job to protect you and to assist you in living a peaceful life in your community.  I'm sure there are officers out there that aren't good officers just like there are doctors who aren't good doctors or trash men who aren't good trash men. But that doesn't give people the right to categorize all of them negatively.  Everyday they put on that blue uniform and kiss their families goodbye they leave knowing that there is a possibility they will not return.

We were faced with that possibility just weeks ago.

Getting that phone call is something that is permanently seared in my mind for ever.

To those of you who have showed an out pouring of your support.  We are forever grateful because you know the kind of man my husband is and realize that he would only do what he HAD to do to  protect innocent lives.  

To those of you who have verbalized your opposition in a rude manner:

Don't judge these officers for their actions because you were not there.  Don't pretend you would have known what to do because that would be ignorant seeing that you don't know the details.  Don't tell them that following protocol is cowardly because thats what they're trained to do. And please don't pretend that this man who literally tried to murder my husband and other police officer... please don't pretend that his life was worth more than these noble officers.

And that's all I have to say 'bout that.

you're going to Holllywood

I've already shared this on Facebook but for those of you who aren't on my FB page I had to share it with you too.

Xander is my star in the making. He loves to make people smile by singing, break dancing, and saying funny one-liners.  If the curls and black eyes don't melt your heart then I don't know what will.

He's singing in the highest voice he can manage to be just like One Republic - ha ha!

random images I like today

This post idea came from the very lovely Elledee.  I honestly think she may be the cutest girl alive.  She's vintage barbie kind of lovely!  And you know my heart for vintage barbies.  

Without further ado...

RANDOM IMAGES I LIKE TODAY

(all img via weheartit)

gotsta love me some vintage

Lately I've been totally ga-ga over vintage clothes.  Tonight I purchased the cutest 1970's jumper that is just too cute and I cannot wait to strut my stuff in this baby.

CHECK IT...

I know... right?!

Won't my yellow bag look awesome with this!!

I'm so excited to get this baby in!

Todays Dinner

This is a fabulous recipe from my friend Allison and it's what we're having for dinner tonight.  I haven't made it for a year or two but it is out of this world delish! The only change I make is that I use fire roasted Big Jim chiles that I get from the local outdoor markets and freeze each summer. And what's better... it's a slow cooker recipe!  So go grab the stuff, give it a try and then go tell Allison at PretendingSanity how awesome it is!

Santa Fe Chicken 

1 lb boneless, skinless chicken breasts cubed, may be frozen

1 cup chicken broth

1 medium red pepper cut into chunks

1 can black beans

1 16oz jar salsa

1 can fiesta or mexicorn

1 small can green chiles

1 tsp cumin

1/2 tsp chile powder

1 small onion chopped

3 cloves garlic, minced

1 block cream cheese

Hot cooked rice

1. Combine all ingredients in crock pot except the cream cheese. Cook on low for 6 to 8 hours (8 hours if chicken is frozen.)

2. During the last half hour, stir in cream cheese. Serve over rice or with rice in a tortilla.

Galatians 2:20

Because of HIM I Have...

Life everlasting - Hope for the future - Peace that passes all understanding - Healing and health for my body and mind - Wisdom beyond measure - Happiness - A man of God to love and protect me -  A guarantee that I will never stand alone - Children who are on FIRE for God - A call on my life - An never ending supply of grace and mercy - Authority - A guide to life - A beautiful today and tomorrow - An ever present help in time of need - Redemption - Friends as close as family - A passion in my heart for people - A comforter to my spirit - 

And a father who loves me more than my mind can even comprehend.

I hope that you all have had a blessed day with your loved ones and I hope above all else that you know that Jesus is the best recipe I've got.  I love you all!

And as I've been saying all day... MERRY EASTER!

I figure if europeans can say Happy Christmas,  I can say Merry Easter.

SMOOCH!